Star Wars being sold to Disney is the best news I’ve heard
in film in a while. It seemed like the sequel trilogy was dead in the water
after the prequels were almost unanimously disliked (I think they were decent
movies. If separated from episodes IV, V and VI, they stand as pretty decent
sci-fi movies, though certainly flawed). But the resurrection of the franchise
and bringing in both Michael Arndt (Little Miss Sunshine, which he won an Oscar
for, Toy Story 3, and the upcoming Hunger Games sequel) and JJ Abrams (if you don’t
know who he is then you probably stumbled on this website by mistake and don’t belong
here at all) is extremely exciting for a Star Wars geek like me. First off, I
know there are thousands if not millions of people who think a new Star Wars
movie is a bad idea. I couldn't disagree more, especially under these circumstances.
The new movies are being produced by the most successful company in the history
of companies, penned by an Academy Award winning writer, and is going to be
helmed by a director with some serious geek cred who grew up as a Star Wars fan
(just watch any of his TV shows or films for proof of this) and wants to make a
movie that will make Star Wars fans proud. I think I've made my excitement clear.
We already know there is going to be mind-blowing interstellar dogfights, state
of the art effects from the folks over at Industrial Light and Magic and back
flipping, saber-spinning, seizure-inducing lightsaber battles, so let’s get
into the Top 5 things I want to see in the new Star Wars movie.
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| Mark Hamill, or Meatloaf on a diet? |
5.
Go Easy on the
Vets. Look, a bigger Star Wars fan you will not find but let’s face it,
Carrie Fisher and Mark Hamill are no Meryl Streep and Marlon Brando, and
certainly less so in their old(er) age. These two have not gotten any more
attractive as the years have passed and their performance creds have lingered
around the Kathy Griffin level of acting (that is to say, not acting). While I absolutely
love the fact that Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa Skywalker Solo Cougar
Mellencamp will have parts in the new movie, I really believe it should be
relegated to minor ones. I mean, I want to see them. I want to see what they’re up to
and by all means I want them to play important roles, but I think limited
screen time would probably be best for the pair. And this is certainly
possible; think how important a role Emperor Palpatine played in the movies,
and was really only given 3 or 4 total scenes were he didn't appear as a blurry
hologram. Shit, look at Boba Fett, he has probably 5 scenes and says a total of
15 words and has since become one of the most popular characters in the history
of science fiction. Harrison Ford on the other hand, we could probably stand to
see a bit more of. He has been steadily acting (successfully) since Star Wars
ended and is a legend in the field starring in some enormously successful
movies. Just as long as his role isn’t that of a desperate father or husband
trying like hell to clear his name or save his family. And as long as he doesn’t
utter the words to a Russian terrorist aboard the ship that made the kessel run
in twelve parsecs: “Get off my Millennium Falcon!”
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| Sexy Mara Jade |
4.
A New Jedi Order.
Who doesn’t love a good light saber duel? The strongest sequences in the entire
prequel trilogy were the lightsaber duels (particularly the Darth Maul vs. Obi-Wan
and Qui-Gon scene from the first movie), so we certainly need to have some
newbies who know their way around a lightsaber.
With Luke (and Leia) being the last Jedis in
the entire galaxy after the death of Vader, the new movies seem to be lacking
the Jedi or Sith adversary it so desperately needs. And with Luke and Leia
being old farts now (how cool would it have been to see Leia as a Jedi in her
prime?) their clearly has to be some new Jedis coming up in the minor leagues. I
think the obvious route to go is have Luke and Leia opening a school for young
Jedis to come and train under the only two Jedis left in the galaxy. With that,
a pretty decent idea would be to have one or several of their students go rogue
and betray Luke’s New Jedi Order. It’d be a good way to establish a sexy young
villain that could last through the sequel trilogy. I’m also curious how many
(if any) of the characters from the Expanded Universe will appear, and in what
capacity. Mara Jade (Luke’s eventual wife with a somewhat troubled past) is one
of the most complex female characters in the entire Star Wars Universe (much more
so than Princess Leia) and has so much depth. I’d be surprised if they were to
use some characters from the Expanded Universe (like Han and Leia’s kids
Anakin, Jaina and Jacen [a possible candidate for the student who goes rogue]) but
left out Mara Jade.
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| Walter Bishop enjoying a cool Slusho |
3.
Some Sweet JJ
Abrams Easter Eggs: JJ Abrams is famous for inserting Easter Eggs (or
intentional hidden messages) into his work. Hidden Lost mentions in his works
like Person of Interest, Fringe, and Cloverfield, the appearance of Slusho in
Cloverfield, Star Trek, Fringe and Alias, the name “Kelvin” (Abrams’ grandfather) in Star Trek,
Lost and Super 8 are all fun little hints that JJ Abrams drops into his works.
We, as fans have come to expect Easter Eggs in all his works (one of which
may play particular importance in my number 1 thing I want to see in Episode
VII). I hope it is safe to assume that some of his frequent collaborators will
also make an appearance (whether behind or in front of the camera). Greg
Grunberg has appeared, in some less obvious ways than others, in almost every
JJ Abrams Joint since Felicity. Damon Lindelof (another gargantuan Star Wars
fan, see the little known TV show LOST for further references) has collaborated
on multiple JJ Abrams projects and could potentially bring some fascinating new
ideas to Episode VII (while Michael Arndt is the primary writer for the new
movie, Lindelof is no stranger to rewrites, having rewritten my favorite Sci-Fi
flick of 2012, Prometheus). It would be great if Matt Reeves (Cloverfield, and
the satisfyingly chilling Let Me in) were brought in in some capacity, and
eventually direct Episode VIII or IX (as Abrams is only signed on for VII). My
suggestion for an Easter Egg would be for a character to say that he found a
blue planet with a mysterious island that is responsible for keeping all of the
evil in the world in and that moves when you spin a Frozen Donkey Wheel.
2. Keep George Lucas
Away: I love George Lucas. He is responsible for the best and most complex
universe since… well, the Universe. His ideas have spawned incredible movies,
fascinating video games and complex literature in the realm of science fiction.
Not to mention his saga has created an entire generation of visionary scientists,
filmmakers and writers (I would not be interested in science fiction or perhaps
even writing itself had I need seen Star Wars and had my imagination expanded
for the first time). All that being said, George Lucas should really have a
minimal role in these movies. Yes, it’s his vision. Yes, it’s his franchise.
Yes, it’s his universe. But look what happened when Lucas was allowed to write,
direct, produce, edit, compose, distribute and basically have violent congress
with Episodes I-III. The prequel trilogy was a substandard inception of the
story of the Skywalker clan (as I discussed before, not bad as a standalone
series, but as a predecessor to perhaps the most iconic trilogy ever
conceived?). As much as I love the man,
I’m perfectly happy only seeing his name next to “Based on the characters
created by:” and nowhere else. What worked about “Empire” and “Jedi” is that they
were Lucas’ brilliant ideas brought to the screen by more capable directors and
writers. That is what I believe we have here. A much more talented director in
JJ Abrams and a brilliant up-and-coming writer in Michael Arndt, who has now
been entrusted with three of the biggest franchises in recent memory (Toy
Story, The Hunger Games and Star Wars).
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| R2D2 outside the Enterprise |
1.
A Shared Star Wars
and Star Trek Universe: I’ll be the first to admit, I’m not sure how
feasible this idea really is. I mean Star Wars is set “a long time ago, in a
galaxy far, far away” (I still get chills when I see those words) and Star Trek
is set in the 23
rd century, the distant future. But the mere fact
that JJ Abrams is responsible for rebooting the two biggest space-based franchises
ever, presents us with a unique opportunity: set Star Wars and Star Trek in the
same universe. Really, how cool would this be? I’m certainly no Star Trek aficionado
so I couldn’t really begin to theorize how this could really happen. And by no
means am I saying: “Hey! What if Captain Kirk and Han Solo opened a bordello
together called Captain James T. NerfHerder’s??” or “How about Data is actually
a much further advanced model of C-3PO?!” (I actually kinda like that one).
But, in the same way JJ Abrams drops little hints and Easter Eggs into his
work (like R2D2 in Star Trek), why not drop a random Romulan in the background of the New Republic? Or why not have a planet designated"Ceti Alpha V"? I'm just saying JJ, it's something to think about.
